4.29.2005

D-U-N Done!

Il est fini.
È rifinito.
Se acaba.
Het is beëindigd.
Είναι τελειωμένο.
It is finished.

My first year of college is over. I survived one full year of engineering school. And yet I feel as if the real challenge still lies ahead of me.

4.26.2005

Finals Week

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Finals Week
Such a stressful week, but in the end it will be worth it. I mean, come on, I get a WHOLE week off before I start back again. What else could I ask for??

4.22.2005

In Response

I was told today that I was a bad friend.

I have let some friendships from high school and home fall by the wayside. I know this. It makes me sad when I pass these people in Mitzi's or on the way to class. It reminds me of what I am missing out on and what I let slip out of my hands and my heart. I know that this is mostly my fault. But it hurts more to have someone who doesn't know me all too well tell me that I am a bad person and a bad friend.

I was hurt. I was very angry. This person was acting like a child and not letting me defend myself. I wanted so bad to scream at this person. He told me that I am only friends with my current close group of friends because I benefited in some way from their friendships. What this may be other than great people to talk to when I need someone, someone to make me laugh when I am sad, someone to have a good time with that understands me and doesn't judge me because of who I have grown up to be, someone who wants the best for me, I don't know. How are these expectations any different from anyone else?

I wrote him an email telling him exactly how I felt about what he said to me. I told him I did not understand how he felt that he had the almighty power to tell me who to be friends with, how to live my life or what kind of person I was based on the above information. In some not so nice, angry words, I voiced my opinion on the issue and told him that I knew my faults and that I still loved these people. In response to my email, he continued to be a immature person, a person that does not really want to get in my way when I am mad. I am still angry at this person and may be for a little while. But I will get over it and move on with my life, without grudges. I pray that he can do the same. It is not worth it to trade our short, precious lives for the drama that is thrown at us.

I grew up a lot when I came to college. I made new friends, friends who I live with in the dorm and friends with whom I have classes and study with and friends who make me laugh and smile. My new friends are in no way better than my old friends, but apparently, I gave off this impression because of my lack of contact with the old friends.

So, if you are an "old friend" that I have abandoned, I am sorry. From the bottom of my heart, I am sorry. My actions, or maybe, lack of actions, do not reflect what kind of person I think you are. I still care about you and it makes me sad when I see you and you don't say more than two words to me. It breaks my heart. I have not been a good friend. Please forgive me.

4.18.2005

The last stretch

This week and next week will be terrible. I have finals next week and SOO much due this week. I am a little worn out already and I haven't even really started yet. But it will be over soon enough. My first year in engineering school is almost to a close. How nice.

4.06.2005

Continued...

I know that the masses are on the edge of their seats waiting for the answer to the question: Will Katie stay in Speed School? Well, tonight, ladies and gentlemen, I have an answer.

A few weeks ago I was completely on the line about this decision. It seemed like everyday I wanted to do something different. I had convinced myself that I wanted to be a high school math teacher. I would be helping people along their walk of life, something that I enjoy doing very, very much. Then I went to Speed School advising for the summer and fall semesters. When my advisor started talking about what classes I needed to take and then said, "Make sure you sign up for co-op seminar," I realized that co-op is not THAT far away. And that day, I wanted to be an engineer.

So, I made a little deal or whatever you want to call it with myself. Earlier this semester, I applied to be an RA for next year. There were very few positions available and many, many applicants. I went through all the interview processes and then the waiting began. I was told by several people that I would probably get the job, so my hopes were a little up. I said to myself, "Self, if you get this job, you will change majors. It will be hard for you to do Speed School and be an RA. If you do not get the job, you will stay." This is what it came down to. This is how torn I was. Well, guess what folks. I didn't get the job. I was told that I did extremely well in the whole interview process and I was a definite hire, but there were not enough job openings. My decision was made.

Now, I have a very good chance of being hired over the summer to be an RA next year (I am an alternate). But, my mind is made up. At least until co-op. If I get the job, I will take it, and be an engineer RA.

Thank you all for caring so much about me and helping me with my decision. I took your comments to heart and some of them made me think long and hard about what I wanted to do. I love you all!

4.03.2005

1920-2005

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We will miss him.